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Sensifer at Elbhangfest 2015

1 Jul

Saturday, June 27 2015

I arrive at Grottenwirtschaft, the sky is gray and clouded, but it has stopped raining… I am still tired from last night, now enjoying a beer, chatting and finally the music starts… at first glance one wouldn’t think so, but Dresden post-rock band Sensifer produce one massive guitar sound on stage, which draws you in and takes you away… it’s a weird surreal scenery: the band is playing inside this garage, the audience is standing at the other side of the road, in the distance the boats on the river and summer-green meadows… people are passing by as the band keeps playing, cyclists and passengers turn heads, slowing down, stopping, some stay and become immersed in the atmospheric guitar sound, others keep walking on by, from one stage to the next, following the river upstream and downstream… then the clouds tear open and the sun breaks through… rays of light are blinding me as I continue listening and photographing…

Sensifer play nearly 2 hours at this year’s Elbhangfest. I had come here because I expected this to be the perfect music for my melancholic mood. Turns out it is a hell lot of fun, which ultimately results in me walking around with the begging hat and collecting donations from the audience, who approves… Sensifer in concert means commitment. They are currently working on a new Ep. For news visit: http://www.sensifer-music.de/news.


Deutsche Version:

Als ich an der Grottenwirtschaft ankomme, ist der Himmel grau und voll Wolken, aber es hat es aufgehört zu regnen. Ich bin noch müde von der letzten Nacht, genehmige mir nun ein Bier und unterhalte mich hier und da, bis die Musik endlich anfängt… Auf den ersten Blick würde man es nicht vermuten, aber die Dresdner Post-Rock Band Sensifer erzeugen einen gewaltigen Gitarren-Sound auf der Bühne, welcher dich hineinzieht und mitnimmt…

Es ist eine sonderbar surrealer Anblick: die Band spielt dort in dieser Garage, das Publikum steht auf der anderen Seite der Straße, in der Ferne sieht man die Bote auf dem Fluß und die sommergrünen Wiesen… dazwischen die Straße, Menschen laufen an uns vorbei, während die Band weiter spielt… im Vorbeilaufen drehen Fahrradfahrer und Passanten ihre Köpfe in Richtung Bühne, werden langsamer, bleiben stehen… manche verharren und tauchen in den atmosphärischen Gitarren-Sound ein, andere gehen weiter, von einer Bühne zur nächsten, sie folgen dem Fluß stromaufwärts und -abwärts… dann lichten sich die Wolken, die Sonne bricht hindurch, ich bin geblendet von ihren Strahlen, als ich weiter der Musik lausche und fotografiere…

Sensifer spielen beinahe 2 Stunden auf dem diesjährigen Elbhangfest. Ich kam mit der Erwartung her, dass die Musik sehr gut zu meiner melancholischen Stimmung passen würde. Doch am Ende war es ein Höllenspaß, was letztlich dazu führte, das ich mit dem Sammelhut herumging und vom Publikum Spenden einsammelte, welches die Aktion auch belohnte… Sensifer im Konzert, das bedeutet vor allem Hingabe.

Die Band arbeitet gerade an ihrer neuen EP. Für mehr Neuigkeiten besucht bitte die Website unter http://www.sensifer-music.de/news.

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Dream Waters

21 Feb

Been diving
in the dream waters
deep
time to get back
to the surface
least I become
lost down here
once again

Pillars 1.III – The Ebon Kteis

27 Jan

Pillars 1.III Pillars 1.III

Today arrived my contributor copy of Pillars Journal 1.III, The Ebon Kteis, which contains my very first published essay and where I delve into the concepts and personal motivations behind one of my artworks. The topic is inspired by the many question I keep receiving about the Mandrake and is titled Regina Amandrakina – Exploration of the Image and Strange Idol. So now all those, who asked me questions, receive here 11 pages food for thought (and of course everybody else is welcome to read this as well, because it’s a heart piece and will help you understand how and why I do what I do!) (;

I immediately started reading and, as with the previous Pillars issues, this one has become again a masterpiece of editing and type setting! It’s obvious there was put again a lot of thought into the editing and arrangement of the different contributions. Photos, art and texts by different authors come together and compliment each other seamlessly. Also the line breaks and paragraphs of written contributions are arranged thoughtfully. Besides this the bronze print on the cover compliments the vibe and aura of this tome just perfectly.

“‘The Ebon Kteis’ is a journey back into Darkness; somber in tone than its older siblings and aiming to be more of a visual feast to inspire Minds & spark the Sacred Flame Within.”

But it is not only the visual side that is utterly appealing about this publication. Anathema has specialised in bringing together artists, occultists and lonesome wolves, which, as different and individual each of them may be, share a mutual vision and idea of truth and searching. And there is another interesting aspect that emerges once you skim through the pages. The topic was given, but each contributor works independently and usually there would not be much interaction, yet each piece of art and writing seems to harmonize with the other, as if led and guided by the same spirits. This is the subtle magic of Pillars, which strikes me with each new release.

This issue is the last in the series (though a new volume, with different outfit is planned). There are once again 230 copies available, half of which have already been sold. So better hurry, least you’ll have to spend ten times as much, once the sold out publication ends up on eBay!

Pillars 1.III – The Ebon Kteis | out January 2015 | www.anathemapublishing.com/

 

New Year’s 2015

5 Jan

IMG_0129+

I spent my New Year’s in a church and I liked it.

I’m from Dresden. That’s the town famous for its late baroque pomp and for being bombed to ashes at the very end of WWII. It’s also known as “Tal der Ahnungslosen” due to the geographical location, which made it difficult to receive tv from Western Germany during GDR times. It is also known for people protesting peacefully on the streets, which eventually lead to the events that brought down the Wall. In 1989 the motto “Wir sind das Volk” was used because people yearned for more freedom, equality and unity. It was motivated by positive ideals and hope. 25 years later people are protesting again on Dresden’s streets. They are using the same motto, but the motivation is a different one. People are now driven by fear, frustration and hatred. Interviews with single participants of these “silent protest marches” show how diverse the motifs are. Social injustice ranks high, amongst fears of being outnumbered, underprivileged. People are troubled with various problems. The actual motto of these demonstrations occurs almost secondary to the participants, but it is this motto, which is now being perceived world-wide: “against the Islamification of the Christian Western civilisation”. The main motif, which is carried forth on banners and in news headlines is xenophobia. The individual motivations of the people do not make the headlines.

In other countries people protest for freedom, justice and a better education. The message is clear and unequivocal.

In Germany people are apparently unable to formulate their actual concerns or they feel not taken serious if they do. Instead people now march under the banner of “PEGIDA”. It is a motto that the biggest number of the participants of these protests does not support. Yet they decide to follow it for whatever reason. The message on that banner is clear and there is no way of trying to relativize it. This is tragic and we have seen before where such passive followership can lead.

I truly hope that most of the people participating in these protest will come to senses and choose the right language for their goals. Preserving our values is indeed something to stand up for. But it is even better done by contributing one’s part and being a good example, whether you’re an artist, architect, dental technician, engineer, gardener, hair stylist, waiter/waitress, university professor or unemployed. It starts with yourself and good manners. It continues with being nice to others.

So what did I do this New Year’s? I was in fact still sick with tonsillitis and had been on antibiotics since the weekend. I felt weak and in a situation where help, love and comfort are needed. I’m extremely grateful to have two loving parents and friends that care for me in such situations. I’m grateful there was a doctor on Saturday morning to have checked me and prescribed the necessary medication. I’m grateful also, to have spirits to call upon and pray to in such a situation.

I do in fcat believe in god and a higher cause. I am interested in the essence behind the religious forms of all sorts of traditions, which are a continuous inspiration in my art. I take from all places and I pick out the best for myself. I feel this is the natural way to do in life.

We (that is my parents and me) spent this New Year’s in a small church in Dresden Plauen. This in itself felt like a little miracle and it would have sounded like an impossibility if you would have told me a few weeks ago. But this is another story and here we were. It’s been my dream to see this church from the inside for years. And little could I know of how beautiful its art nouveau interior really was…

The pastor made a very short speech, welcoming the guests, introducing the organist, Andreas Jud, a young, award-winning musician from Switzerland, and then wished us all a Happy New Year. The rest of the evening was music. No talk, no politics, no agendas. Just the organ in full blast, the organist giving his very best. And every attendant was left to his own thoughts and contemplations.

With this in mind I wish all my followers and friends all the best for 2015.

(more photos of the church to follow in my next post)

Autumn Fire (Change of Season)

19 Sep

I feel the change of season

this autumn fire

the nights getting longer

the impending darkness

this cold breath down my neck.

But I am aflame and

burning with passsion

to a degree that it

almost consumes me.

Memories and dreams

the future and the past

they are merging

in a round-dance of autumn leaves

in the yellow light of street lamps

or in the dim grayness of

one drizzly September day.

I am day dreaming

and the world around me becomes

like the surface of a pond

into which I dip my finger

and suddenly the whole picture

starts to ripple and disperse

and the voices of people talking to me are muted

and I hear something else.

Silence.

The veil is thinning.

I am dreaming of reconciliation.

Fish Dream

2 Jul

I am in a small town with average middle class, one family houses. (The place reminds me of Pforzheim.) I am inside one of these houses, first downstairs, in the living room and then upstairs, in the attic. The attic is a single long room flooded with light. It is a warm and friendly atmosphere, sunlight illuminates the walls and floor. It is almost as if the roof was missing but then I see it is made of glass and held by a slender steel construction. I look at the wall to my left and see an old shower head, which looks as if it had been out of use for a long time. Around the shower the wall looks run down and the plaster has come off. Beneath the barren stone is covered in green moss or algae. The scene looks like a photo. Sunlight is shining on the spot, water drips from the shower in slow motion and the green is a nice contrast to the warm rust-colored wall. I am thinking how beautiful it is up here and that it would be worth to do some construction work and renew the room. But then I see at other the end of the roof that it is somehow merged with the town’s modern library building. The latter has ten stories but oddly it feels I am at the same level. Either way, for some reason it would make any construction work in here complicated. I turn around. And there I see at the back of the long room – which seems to have gotten even longer – right there, where I had stood before, a couple of fishes. I am not wondering how these may have gotten here nor how it was possible for them to float around in the room. I remember how I had observed them before from the corner of my eye: a mother with her siblings. The mother is about 1,20 m long and has a pattern similar to those of zebra sharks. Her back and large dorsal fin are a dark brown, which runs down her sides in a few wide bands that become narrower towards the belly. Her lateral fins are also dark brown whilst the belly is a bright white. Her young ones are smaller, about 30-40 cm long and of a lighter color, but already sporting a similar pattern. They will probably become darker with age. I remember how I had been watching them up-close, when kneeling beside a small ditch, holding my hand in the cool running water, the fishes however floating around me in the air. It feels like I am in a vacuum. Time seems to stand still. Only the fish and water from the shower head are moving. The former in what seems to be their natural tempo, the latter in slow motion. Then I remember there was another big fish and I am now holding this fish in both arms. I am actually embracing and cuddling it. I feel a great joy and the fish seems to enjoy it too. I look at its beautiful scales and form: the entire body and fins are a matte black with only subtle hues of blue or grey-brown. It has an almost perfect round shape in profile but is otherwise a slender specimen with a peculiar serrated dorsal fin, the edge of which is elegantly rounded off and flowing straight into the tailfin. The pectoral fins are rather small and the ventral fin is similar to the dorsal one. I think how beautiful this fish is. Then I am back in the living room. I don’t remember what I had just experienced. Instead I am worried. Looking outside through the windows, I am expecting a volley of gunfire to hit any second. Then I am somewhere out of town and looking at the houses my last thought is how vulnerable this beautiful place was. Then I wake up

Hellebores

14 Mar

sometimes these flowers are in my dreams

and the world is inside of a hellebore

my vision is that of a bug and these plants occur like giants

I observe the juices pulse inside of stems and leaves

I see every vein

I see flowers opening and unfolding

I love all their colors and shapes

just like the bees feed on them at a time

when other resources are yet scarce

sometimes in dream I hear them

move and unfurl

not so little froglings

so-called roses in the snow

stigmata the tips of serpent tongues

roots the dread head of Medusa

in my hand

eyes are

beneath are

diamonds